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Friday, April 14, 2006

"Up the riggings, you monkeys! Break out those sails and watch them fill with the wind that's carrying us all to freedom!"

After having read both Jack's and Mirty's thoughts on pessach, I have come to some conclusions of my own on the true meaning of pessach and freedom.

I think that's the whole point of pessach is that we must try and figure out what it means to be slaves in order to really appreciate freedom. I actually can finally relate (somewhat) after 32 years of celebrating pessach. Since I'm currently in the process of getting divorced, many friends and family have joked with me that now I can truly feel the meaning of the holiday, going from slavery to freedom.

The truth is actually very close to that. I have felt a freedom that I haven't known for years, but the 600,000 men (plus the millions of women and children who left) had each other during this journey. I have only myself, eventhough I have wonderful support from friends and family. I still feel alone, not lonely, but alone. I have littke desire to be in large company, basically because I feel at this point in my life, that I can only truly trust myself (and my lawyer) to know what's right and whats wrong.

I know that in time I will get over these somewhat anti-social feelings, but I guess after having been burned, it takes a while for the healing process to be complete.

Shabbat Shalom and Moadim L'simcha

J.

Today's quote is from Captain Blood(1935)


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The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
– Abraham Lincoln

4 Comments:

At 8:43 PM, April 14, 2006, Blogger Amishav said...

Hey, I'm right there with you buddy. I got divorced a year and a half ago now, and this year was the first seder without the ex- I did go over to her house last year- I did it all myself with just me and the boys. It was great in some ways but it was still hard in others. I'm just starting to come out of my shell and look around a bit. Feel free to drop by and read some of my posts in the meanwhile I'll put you on my link list to make sure I stay up with what's going on with you.

A.

 
At 10:09 AM, April 20, 2006, Blogger Yona said...

There is a certain clarity which comes from divorce. A realization of what is truly important. It is amazing how much time is waste on the static of life.

 
At 10:55 AM, April 20, 2006, Blogger Jerusalemcop said...

amishav - thanks for the support. I've added yopu to my links too. I've been reading your posts, very interesting.

Yona - very true. thanks for dropping in.

J.

 
At 8:50 PM, April 24, 2006, Blogger Greg said...

J'cop: I really, honestly hope you start feeling better a.s.a.p. I say this because I really feel your pain-as banal as that may sound-and I hope for the best in the future.

Tihye hazak ve'amiz, Greg.

 

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